Life's our oyster and we're gonna suck that bitch down with a champagne chaser.



  • Behavioral Therapist
  • MA Developmental Psychology, Columbia
  • BS Psychobiology/ French, UCLA




  • Movies to See:
    Mission Impossible
    Haywire
    Shame
    A Dangerous Method
    Underworld:Awakening


  • TV Shows to Watch:
    Portlandia
    The Life & Times of Tim


  • Book to Read:
    Game of Thrones
    by George R.R. Martin


  • Album to Listen to:
    The Black Keys
    El Camino


  • Person to Hate:
    Newt Gingrich


  • Group of People to Despise:
    Fox & Friends




 

Bitchin Links


Blogs and Writers of Note

Mary's Website

Mary's Blog

Ravi's Blog

Lauren's Blog

Cheryl's LiveJournal

TV Squad

The Soup

Cracked

Best Week Ever

The Chive

On Location Vacations

Cute Overload

Michael Moore's Blog

Joel Stein Columns

Maureen Dowd Columns

Secular Coalition of America

Richard Dawkins


Personal Stuff

My Facebook

My Twitter

My YouTube Videos

My DVD Collection

My Books

Machatz Self-Defense


For Politics and Political Satire

The Huffington Post

Salon.com

Politico

The Daily Beast

The Onion

The Colbert Nation

Truthdig

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart


For Entertainment

Ain't It Cool News

IGN

Rotten Tomatoes

DVD Active

Movie Stinger

AdTunes

The Daily Wav

Movie Mistakes


For Humor and Other Things

HuffPost Comedy

Funny or Die

The Lonely Island

Shit My Dad Says

F My Life

Daily Python

College Humor

Super Mario Crossover

People of Walmart

E-Mails from an Asshole

Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

God Checker

Church Sign Maker

Strong Bad Email

Japander: See Actors Embarrass Themselves Abroad

Landover Baptist Church: Jesus Loves You Sometimes


For Bruins

The Daily Bruin

Bruins Nation

Bruin Basketball Report

UCLA Bruin Marching Band: The Solid Gold Sound

The REAL $UC Application

















 
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Wednesday, August 25, 2004  
*This post was inspired when I crossed the street today

Things to Not Do While You're Driving
*The following is a list of various actions and general stupidities that I have actually observed
when looking at other drivers
-The obvious, don't talk on your cell phone without a hands free set (unless it's really really important)
-Don't tend to your children in the back seat no matter how dumbass-like they're being
-Don't apply makeup using the mirror on your fold down thing
-Don't apply makeup using a pocket mirror
-Don't apply makeup using a large mirror
-Don't apply makeup
-Don't change the settings on your radio, ie don't change your preset stations (Guilty)
-Don't change CDs (Guilty)
-Don't drive with your knees
-Don't drive with your chin
-Don't allow the person next to you to drive for you
-Don't let go of the steering wheel for an extended period of time
-Don't look for buildings, restaurants etc while in LA traffic...save it for the suburbs
-Don't put in your contact lenses
-Don't read a magazine
-Don't read a book
-Don't read a romance novel
-Don't eat corn on the cob
-Don't watch the TV that's in your car
-Don't drive a Hummer
-Don't shave
-Don't brush your teeth
-Don't eat sushi
-Don't do your homework (Guilty)
-Don't make a left turn from the right lane
-Don't make out with the other person in your car
And finally,
-Don't be a fuckin' idiot

This concludes my rant about stupid drivers. I know we are all guilty of being douche bags while driving. I know I am. But when it comes to driving, just remember, use good judgement and, if that's not available, just drive really fast.




6:18 PM
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Thursday, August 12, 2004  
Your Life: The Soundtrack

Opening credits:"Word Up" - Cameo
Waking up:"Woke Up This Morning" - A3
Average day:"Spanish Flea" - Herb Alpert
First date:"So Nice" - Marcos Calle
Falling in love:"My Funny Valentine" - Miles Davis
Love scene:"Isfahan" - ES Posthumus
Fight scene:"Pompeii" - ES Posthumus or "The Chase through Coruscant" - John Williams or "Fire Like This" - ?
Breaking up:"Shut Up" - Black Eyed Peas
Getting back together:"The Reason" - Hoobastank...duh
Secret love:"Aicha" - Khaled
Life's okay:"Caravan" - Maynard Ferguson
Mental breakdown:"Chameleon" - Maynard Ferguson
Driving:"Mona Lisa Overdrive" - Juno Reactor
Learning a lesson:"Bohemian Rhapsody" - Queen
Deep thought:"Soleil de Marseille" - MC Solaar
Flashback:"Vindicated" - Dashboard Confessional
Partying:"Let's Get Retarded" - Black Eyed Peas
Happy dance:"Hands Up" - Black Eyed Peas
Regreting:"Taking Me Over" - Evanescence
Long night alone:"Madame Butterfly" - Maria Callas
Death scene:"O Fortuna from Carmina Burana" - Carl Orff
Closing credits:"Navras" - Don Davis

Your Life: The Soundtrack brought to you by BZOINK!
EmotionDump - 100% Anonymous Emotions and Confessions





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Wednesday, August 11, 2004  
Survey...Overload
What is your full name?:Pasha Behforouz Bahsoun..I swear to GOD if any of you fuckers make fun of my noble name...
Are you named after anyone?:I think so
What's your screename?:PBeclair23
Would you name a child of yours after you?:Possibly
If you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?:Petra
If you could switch names with a friend who would it be?:My friend Mega Man
Are there any mispronounciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?:P'SHAH...NO OK...NO
Would you drop your last name if you became famous?:Probably not
Basics
Your gender::Male
Straight/Gay/Bi::Straight
Single?::Yeah
Birthdate::July 23, 1985
Your age::19
Age you act::Sometimes 7, sometimes 58...depends on the day of the week
Age you wish you were::I'm good as is
Your height::6' 1"
Eye color::Brown
Happy with it?::Yep
Hair color::Black
Happy with it?::Yep
Lefty/rightly/ambidextrous::Rightly a righty
your living arrangement::A...house?
Your family::I have one?
Have any pets?::Not anymore
Whats your job?::Blockbuster Customer Service Representative and Assistant Kung Fu Instructor and Playboy
Piercings?::Nope
Tattoos?::Nope
Obsessions?::Upcoming movies, video games, perfection, my hair
Addictions?::Video games, reality tv, meat
Do you speak another language?::French, working on Persian and hopefully Italian
Have a favorite quote?:At the moment...Chaos was the law of nature; order was the dream of man
Do you have a webpage?:http://www.thejazzybahsoun.blogspot.com
Deep Thoughts about Live and You in it
Do you live in the moment?:I don't exactly have a time machine
Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?:Soommmeeetiimes
Do you have any secrets?:I guess
Do you hate yourself?:Hell no
Do you like your handwriting?:I do...no one else does
Do you have any bad habits?:Obsession with having my stuff in order
What is the compliment you get from most people?:"Aaaww...you're so sweet"
If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?:Mega Man
What's your biggest fear?:Losing any member of my family
Can you sing?:Hell no
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?:Not seriously....jokingly all the time
Are you a loner?:Not really
If you were another person, would you be friends with you?:What in the fuck....Yes.....idiot
Are you a daredevil?:Depends on my endorphin level
Is there anything you fear or hate abou yourself?:High stress level and getting easily distracted
Are you passive or agressive?:Aggressive
Do you have a journal?:This one I guess
What is your greatest strength and weakness?:Strength: Perseverence; Weakness: Freaking out
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?:Getting easily annoyed
Do you think you are emotionally strong?:Yeah
Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?:It hasn't hurt me up till now..so no
Do you think life has been good so far?:Sweet as pie
What is the most important lesson you've learned from life?:Go with the flow
What do you like the most about your body?:My body shape/structure
What do you like least about your body?:Intrusive eyebrows
Do you think you are good looking?:Hey there...How you doin'?
Are you confident?:Most of the time
What is the fictional character you are most like?:GAMBIT
Are you perceived wrongly?:From people who don't know me
Do you....
Smoke?:Nope
Do drugs?:Nerp
Read the newspaper?:Yesh
Pray?:Jesus Christ Superstar no
Go to church?:HAHA
Talk to strangers who IM you?:Yeah...then I block them
Sleep with stuffed animals?:I used to...Hobbes and Marsupilami
Take walks in the rain?:If I'm outside...and it starts to rain.....I kind of have to
Drive?:Yeah
Like to drive fast?:Late at night
Like your voice?:Sure
Hurt yourself?:Always
Been in love?:Not really
Gone skinny dipping?:Jah
Done drugs?:Non
Had surgery?:Naw
Gotten beaten up?:Hell no
Been on stage?:Yep
Thought about suicide?:Nein
Do you think God has a gender?:I don't think non-existant deities have genders
Where do you think we go when we die?:Into the ground
Friends
Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?:Yah
Who is your best friend?:Lots of people...the whole batallion
Who's the one person that knows the most about you?:Probably Ilana
What's the best advice that anyone has ever given you?:Don't be dumb
Thing you're picked on most about?:Being Middle-Eastern
Who's your longest known friend?:I still talk to Adam online...so Adam
Newest?:Ravi I think
Funniest?:Me
Weirdest?:Jeremy
Smartest?:Ilana
Last person you talked to online?:Ilana and Ravi
Who do you talk to most online?:Ilana
Who's the nicest?:Me
Who's the most outgoing?:Kevin
Who's the best singer?:I'm not friends with sewing machines
Who's the best dancer?:I do not know
Have you ever thought of having sex with a friend?:Don't they have to be friends before you can sleep with them?
Who's your second family?:My batallion
Do you always feel understood?:Sure
Who's the loudest friend?:Jeremy
Who's house were you at last?:Uuuuhh...Jeremy's?
Have you ever...
Killed someone?:Yeah..like I would tell you
Made out with a stranger?:Naw...gamn
Had sex with a stranger?:Naw...gamn
Thought you were going crazy?:For sure
Kissed the same sex?:Like non family no...gross
Been betrayed?:I think so
Broken the law?:Positively
Killed an animal by accident?:I reckon no
On purpose?:Fishing in Puerto Vallarta and damn ants and fruitflies and silverfish
Met a celebrity?:Yeah
Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?:YEAH...Miss Levy!!
Had a nervous breakdown?:I reckon not
Beliefs
Believe in life on other planets?:It'd be an awful waste of space if there wasn't
Miracles?:Only in hockey
Astrology?:No....it's entertaining though
God?:Nope
Santa?:Sure
Ghosts?:No...but that'd be bitchin
Love at first sight?:Soiytanly
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?:Yeah
Love and all that
Do you consider love a mistake?:Sometimes...mostly not
Are you a romantic?:When I want to be
What do you find romantic?:Women?
Turn-on?:Women
Turn off?:Men
First kiss?:Francis when I was 5
Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them?:Yeah
Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking?:I damn well hope so
What is best about the opposite sex?:The curvature
What is the worst thing about the opposite sex?:Elbows
What's the last present someone gave you?:My uncle sent me a birthday check
Are you in love?:With myself...muahahah
Have you ever been in love?:Not really
Do you want to get married someday?:Sure
Do you want children someday?:Yes
Who was the Last person...
That haunted you?:What?! The boogie man...Who the fuck wrote these questions
That you laughed at?:Ilana
You wanted to kill?:Lots of people
That laughed at you?:Erica
You went shopping with?:Ilana and Erica...they did the freakin shopping
That broke your heart?:Jennifer Garner
To disappoint you?:A couple people
To ask you out?:Some girl at blockbuster...lots of freaks there
To make you cry?:I dunno...My mom? I dunno
That kissed you?:Ma
That hugged you?:Ma
You slow danced with?:Geez I dunno...I think someone in marching band
You fast danced with?: I do not "fast dance"
You sang with?:I do not "sing"
You saw?:My mom
You missed?:My aunt
Right this moment...
Are you going out?:Not anytime soon
What are you wearing now?:Boxers and a tanktop
Body part you're touching now?:My chin
What are you worried about right now?:Parking appeal
What book are you reading?:The Bourne Identity
What's on your mousepad?:Guess models
Are you bored?:A bit
Are you listening to music?:Not right now
Are you sick of this survey?:I'm sick of all surveys

All about you... bored huh? brought to you by BZOINK!
EmotionDump - 100% Anonymous Emotions and Confessions

3:00 AM
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Monday, August 09, 2004  
The Survey Cometh

1. Say something good that happened to you today: I had a good sandwich for lunch
2. What is your general philosophy of life? Never give up, never surrender
3. What is the worst thing you have lived through? My aunt's breast cancer
4. How old is your inner child? 8
5. Do you believe in a higher power, and if so, what name do you give it? I do not...the only higher power is one's mind
6. Are you allergic to anything, and if so, what? Jeezy creezy...hayfever like hell and walnuts
7. Write a haiku on the spot (5-7-5):

Darkness fills the void
Nothing seen, only terror
The end approaches

8. Favorite animal? Tiger
9. Favorite LJ community? N/A
10. Coffee, tea, or soda--how do you get your caffiene fix? Soda shall suffice.....SURGE
11. Idealist or realist? Idealist
12. Are you lucky or unlucky? Depends on what day of the week it is
13. How much do you normally Enough
14. Last time you got sick? Ummmmm...no ideer
15. Favorite word or phrase to use when cussing someone out? You go to hell asshole!! YOU GO TO HELL AND YOU DIE!!! Beeotch
16. Best movie made before 1970? Le Quai des Brumes
17. After 1970? That's a tough question.....Star Wars, I suppose
18. Within the past five years? Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
19. What is your quest? To fulfill what I must do
20. Favorite TV drama? Nip/Tuck, Alias and 24
21. Favorite sitcom? Scrubs
22. Favorite reality show? Big Brother!
23. Favorite game show? The Price is Right
24. Favorite talk show? Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Daily Show
25. A quote that sticks in your head: This is the life we chose, the life we lead and there is only one guarantee: None of us will see heaven............first one that came to me
26. Favorite toy as a child? Heman Power Sword
27. Last thing you made with your own hands? UUummmm....I have no idea...I think I built a shelf or something
28. Last fight you got into? Well Saturday with Shlomo but that doesn't count....So last Saturday with Wolf....beat that fool DOWN
29. Last time you were hospitalized? Never overnight, thankfully. Last time was after my car accident
30. Favorite kind of flower? Ummm...blue ones
31. Are you now, or have you ever been, a communist? Haven't we all? No? Fine.
32 Favorite word? Bitchin
33. Last thing you picked up off the ground? GE Classes for UCLA
34. Favorite book as a child? Peter Rabbit
35. Favorite book as a juvenile? Boxcar Children and Goosebumps books
36. Favorite book as an adult? Da Vinci Code, Prayer for Owen Meany and the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series
37. Last time you flipped someone the bird? I have no idea...I was probably being playful last time I did
38. Do you have any siblings, and if so, how many? I AM THE ONLY ONE
39. Make _____, not war: Sandwiches
40. Favorite singer? Frank Sinatra
41. Favorite songwriter? Norah Jones I guess
42. Favorite performer? BB King
43. Surprise parties--yes or no? Sure...don't touch my stuff though
44. Where do you get your news from? Newspaper, CNN, local news
45. If you had to challenge someone to a duel of some kind, what your weapon of choice be? Bo Staff, naturally
46. Favorite kind of soup? Lentil
47. What, if any, parts of your body do you shave, wax, or otherwise remove hair from? My rapidly growing freakin facial hair
48. What is happiness to you? Being Zen
49. Least favorite household chore? Vacuuming the house
50. Favorite thing to do on a cold and rainy night? Stick my head out the window
51. Peter Pan or Captain Hook--who is cooler? Hook
52. Have you ever written/carved/etc. "I was here" on anything? I carved my name on the elevator fire emergency warning sign thing when we first moved in...my mom yelled at me
53. Favorite mythology? It sounds ultra geeky...but the mythology of Marvel Comics
54. Favorite magazine? OXM for the moment
55. Law & Order--original, SVU, or Criminal Intent? Original
56. Worst pickup line ever used on you? Is your name...PAAAAAAAAAAAAASHA
57. Best job you ever had? Counselor at La Cienega Park
58. What do you know how to fix? a lot of things
59. Favorite place to go in the town you live? La Brea, Melrose, Beverly Dr
60. Favorite munchie? Munchies...the mixed things
61. Movie with the best one-liners? NAPOLEON DYNAMITE!!! GOSH!!!!!!
62. How do you groom your nails? By...clipping them?
63. Last pity party you held for yourself? I wouldn't know how
64. Last post-it note written? -adelphia products tab
- security services
- learn more
- freedom internet security
65. If you could go back in time to a specific place and era, when and where would it be? The swingin 60s
66. How much money do you have in cash right now? Let's see....$48.70
67. What’s the best joke you know how to tell? Just random stuff
68. Last gift that you gave someone? I have no idea...is that bad?
69. Last time you got any? LAST NIGHT WITH CHOH MOMMA! KNAAWMEAN?
70. Favorite superhero? Gambit
71. What songs do you know all the lyrics to by heart? Luck be a Lady, New York New York...and some others
72. What did you buy on your last trip to the store? At Trader Joe's...lots of stuff...salami, cheese, bread etc
73. Worst habit? Being stresstastic
74. Last thing you quit? I was playing Chronicles of Riddick...and it said "Quit Game"....so that
75. WB--too cheesy for its own good or just cheesy enough? Smallville good...Gilmore Girls BAAAAAAADDDDD
76. Pet peeve? Ignorance...utter ignorance
77. What do you grab to drink when you're hot, sweaty, and thirsty? Soda works well
78. Do you wear a watch? Yep
79. What were you doing before you started taking this survey? TRYING TO FIND A GOD DAMN REPLACEMENT COURSE FOR ENGLISH 4W
80. What do you wish you were doing instead of taking this survey? Playing the games I rented
81. What's preventing you from doing that? ....doing this survey
82. What are your plans for the rest of the day? It's Midnight: 30....so...sleep
83. Have you ever been arrested? Nerp
84. Favorite kind of poetry? Emily Dickinson, Oscar Wilde, mine...
85. Favorite kind of music? An eclectic mix of everything...but I favor Big Band and Swing
86. How many different kinds of solitaire do you know how to play? 10
87. What are you a member of? UCLA BRUIN MARCHING BAND
88. Do you like green eggs and ham? Pigs and chicken abortions...hell yeah
89. Is the glass half-empty or half-full? It's full now...I refilled it
90. Who is the wind beneath your wings? My family
91. Favorite John Hughes film? John Hughes: Who in the Name of Jesus am I?
92. Would you follow the white rabbit down the hole? Which hole? Not that one...not that one either...yeah ok, that one right there
93. What classes have you failed in your lifetime? None thankfully
94. Favorite comedian? Eddie Izzard
95. Monkeys--funny, yes? You bet your sweet ass
96. Favorite Beatles song? Yesterday
97. Walk, bike ride, or drive? Walk or drive
98. Do you take vitamins, and if so, which ones? Fish Oil and Multivitamin pills
99. Bugs Bunny or Mickey Mouse? Bugs is my man...bunny

I need a nap...that was freakin' long...you all had better read it

2:49 AM
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Saturday, August 07, 2004  
Still in the OC

Kvetcher22: u suck
Kvetcher22: YOU SUCK
PBeclair23: u do now
Kvetcher22: ive always
PBeclair23: diggin yourself deeper down
PBeclair23: keep goin
Kvetcher22: down on my knees, perhaps?
PBeclair23: u know it
Kvetcher22: =-O

Yep....yep

4:43 AM
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You're in the OC Now, Bitch

Kvetcher22: i wanna be a skank

Who will be her first victim?

4:35 AM
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Friday, August 06, 2004  
Separated at Birth
Copying what Ilana has done before, I have decided to have a "separated at birth" post of my own. It's been over a year since I saw this person at graduation and the memory of her was inspired by a conversation I had with Soo Mee earlier today but was a conclusion I had reached a while ago.

I hope the Theiss doesn't read my blog.

I really really hope she doesn't.

The Theiss


Cryptkeeper


One and the same!?!? I think so!!

1:07 AM
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Monday, August 02, 2004  
Forgotten Things in Summer of Lazy
Alright the summer is about half over, so in an effort to perpetuate my self-proclaimed "Summer of Lazy," I shall now list things that I haven't accomplished ("accomplished") so far this summer. This includes movies not seen, activities not had etc.

Movies Not Seen and Movies to be Seen
King Arthur
I, Robot
NOT CATWOMAN
The Bourne Supremacy
Donnie Darko: The Director's Cut
The Village
The Manchurian Candidate
Harold and Kumar go to White Castle
NOT THUNDERBIRDS
Garden State
Collateral
Open Water
Spider-Man 2 again

Activities not Accomplished
-Perfect my Christopher Walken impression
-Read a lot more (I'm a slow reader)
-Swim a lot more (hindered by an EMPTY FUCKING POOL)
-100 sit-ups and 35 push-ups a nightly (I've done this like a week out of the whole summer...hence summer of lazy)
-Practice my trumpet a lot more (need to...a lot more)
-Extend my endurance and range on my trumpet (almost there with the range part...high E here I come)
-Less trash tv (who can possibly accomplish this with shows like Big Brother 5 and Amish in the City)
-Beat the majority of my games (getting there)
-Buy too much crap on eBay (oh wait...I've done this)
-Nearly get sued by a major motion picture company (oh wait...I've done this too)
-Sell my iPod (I'm trying)
-Sell my dvd player
-Write a lot more blog entries
-Do absolutely no academic related work (oh wait...I've done this TEN-FOLD)

Necessary Activities that I don't want to do but have to
-Get a haircut (TRIM)
-Get extra hours at work (nah...scratch that)
-Bone up for classes in the fall to make up for last quarter's bomb
-Do more chores to help Ma out
-See a lot of movies (what's this doing in this category?)
-Learn to use the washing machine
-Not be such a lazy bastard

Accomplished Activities
-See a lot of freakin movies (A LOT)
-Play a lot of video games
-Read a lot (I'm on my 5th book of the summer)
-Extend my trumpet range
-Nearly perfect my Bo Staff fighting techniques
-Get all the classes I wanted for the fall
-Get my hair set on fire (I got my revenge..)
-Hook up with my homies more (not enough though)
-Write more
-Get a job
-Roll in the dough with birthday money and paychecks
-Go to Kung Fu class every week
-Be a lazy mofo the rest of the time ('HO yeah)





2:16 AM
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