Life's our oyster and we're gonna suck that bitch down with a champagne chaser.

  • Behavioral Therapist
  • MA Developmental Psychology, Columbia
  • BS Psychobiology/ French, UCLA

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Sunday, March 11, 2007  
W.A.W.J.T: What Antipsychotics Would Jesus Take?
Religion has always been a point of conflict with me, and my family. Namely that we don't subscribe to any sort of organized religion and are happy that way. Having a semi-religious girlfriend (me?! With girlfriend!?) has led to a sort of inner-debate but I've concluded that even though I don't believe what many others do believe in, as long as that aspect of their lives remains just that, one aspect, and doesn't interfere with any other parts of their belief system, such as political stance, then I'm fine with it, for the most part.

That being doesn't change the fact that when it comes to religion, there are crazies everywhere on both ends of the spectrum. There's everyone's favorite loony in Iran, there's everyone's favorite hillbilly in Washington and then there's that whole region of the country, on the southside of the United States...and sanity (has anyone seen Jesus Camp??). This leads me to the main thesis of this post. While not all religious people are crazy, all crazy people are religious.

What a wild generality I just made, and of course you can find counter-examples, but be honest. From the White House to Tom Cruise to Ted Haggard to the guy yelling at buses on the corner of the street to Osama, there are way too many examples in this wacky world of ours that supports this point. As there are different levels of religiosity (it's a word) in this world, there are levels of insanity of religiosity. There's Tom Cruise, doesn't really hurt anyone directly, the Scientologist. There's Christian Evangelical Fundamentalist, altering the make-up of this country's government and civic policies, hurts a lot of people. Thre's Islamic Fundamentalist, goals to destroy the Western World, hurts a lot of people too. It's hard to see past these components of religious fervor that frankly scares the hell out of me and seems to completely contradict any teachings that these religions are based on, Jesus, Mohammed, Xenu or otherwise. But some of the nutjobs are just crazy all on their own. Now for a true life example.

Sitting with my lovely girlfriend before her class started, having a conversation all to ourselves, an elderly, not really crazy looking lady began to speak to us.

"Excuse me dears..."
"I don't mean to...interrupt...any conversation you might be having...."
"'s ok."
"Isn't it hot today?"
"'s pretty warm."
"I agree. Well I'm wearing too many layers, and I'm really hot..."
"Would your friend like this jacket?"
"It's brand-new from the Gap."
"I don't..."
"It looks like it would be her size."
"It's not dirty or anything. I'm not sick."
"Uh...dyou want it?"
My girlfriend chimes in, "Um not really. Why don't you leave it here and one of the workers or homeless people can take it."
"You don't have to be scared of me."
"Ok it's fine. We have to go to class anyway."
"What a beautiful day!"
"Yeah...nice day...bye."
"We should praise god for such a beautiful day!"
"Holy crap. Ok let's go."
"Praise god with me!"
"Bye bye then. Good luck with the jacket."

When the conversation started, in the back of my mind I was thinking, this person was either going to ask me for some money or start talking about god in some way. Now you might accuse me of being completely cynical. This poor woman did nothing wrong. If anything she did something that few people do in this city, country and world: she was being kind, maybe even generous. She may have even been following the doctrine of her savior, which few Christians do these days, which is to give to others and to the needy (we're students, so we're kinda sorta needy). Perhaps, I should blame today's society for having me jump to the wild conclusion that this old woman sprayed anthrax onto this jacket or the jacket was some sort of beacon for a sniper to pinpoint and fire at. But in all honesty, cynicism aside, who in their right mind, Goodwill and Salvation Army aside, comes up to a perfect stranger and offers them a piece of clothing you're wearing. As kind-hearted and good-intentioned it might be, it's fuckin crazy, whether you praise god or not.

Walking by the spot 5 minutes later after escorting my lady-friend to class, the woman was gone, and there was no jacket left. Perhaps she moved on to offer her jacket to another unsuspecting bystander, or to another subject in her elaborate social experiment.

I'm not sure if Jesus would approve. Or Mohammed. Or Buddha. Or Vishnu. Or Zeus. Or Xenu. Or the Easter Bunny. Or Darth Vader. Or Batman. Or the Care Bears. Or...

12:58 AM


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