The Jazzy Bahsoun

Life's our oyster and we're gonna suck that bitch down with a champagne chaser.

Behavioral Therapist
MA Developmental Psychology, Columbia
BS Psychobiology/ French, UCLA

Shelfari: Book reviews on your book blog

Movies to See:
Mission Impossible
Haywire
Shame
A Dangerous Method
Underworld:Awakening

TV Shows to Watch:
Portlandia
The Life & Times of Tim

Book to Read:
Game of Thrones
by George R.R. Martin

Album to Listen to:
The Black Keys
El Camino

Person to Hate:
Newt Gingrich

Group of People to Despise:
Fox & Friends

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Blogs and Writers of Note

Mary's Website

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Friday, May 27, 2005
No Soup for You!
It has always been my belief that it's the little things in life that make it worth living. Such is the case when yesterday I only had one class from 9am-10am since my other noon class was cancelled. Driving home, I realized that I could go get a nutritious, wholesome breakfast at everyone's favorite promoter of heart disease, McDonalds. There's something about places like McDonalds that remind you of an earlier time, a (some say) better time, when we were younger, getting those happy meals with those tantalizing toys. We loved those symbols of childhood, despite the gastric bypass surgery that would result from so many visits. Collect them all? Oh I'll collect them all. No matter what it takes.

I drove on over to the fast food establishment close to where I live at around 10:30, hoping to get an Egg McMuffin or two...or maybe even a Sausage McMuffin. Thinking of the possibilities made me giddy with joy. Walking up to the counter to order, I realized the menu for breakfast was no longer up. Instead, the regular burger menu was up. But there were so many people there. They couldn't have been there to get a Big Mac with supersize fries this early in the morning....could they?

"Welcome to McDonalds."
"Uh thanks...you...too"
"How can I help you?"
"Are you guys still serving breakfast?"
"No...it's over."

Now is that a response to a query from a hungry teenager regarding the most important meal of the day? This response was such a shock to me, I could barely think of a response. Here is the conversation replayed to show how I heard it.

"Welcome to McDonalds."
"Uh thanks...you...too"
I always do that. Note to self: think of a better response next time. Don't welcome people back.
"How can I help you?"
Oh you can help me.
"Are you guys still serving breakfast?"
"NO. IT'S OVER!"
"But...it can't be!"
"OOOOOVVVEEEERRRRRR!!!!"
"This...this isn't possible...it's only 10:30 in the morning!"
"DID YOU JUST GET HERE?! WE START LUNCH AT 10:30 TO PLEASE ALL THE HORDES LARGE, LARGE PEOPLE! LOOK AROUND YOU!!"
"But...I don't understand!"
"It's not meant to be understood....Now, GET OUT!!"
"I....I..."
"OUT!!!"

This conversation with Anna-Maria was severly damaging not only to my stomach, but to my psyche as well. How could they end breakfast that early? And not only was the truth hurtful, but it was the way Anna-Maria delivered it. It's over. So... final. Irreversible. That's not a way to deliver such horrific news that breakfast is no longer being served. It's kicking someone while they're down is what it is.

So I went home, to wallow in my ordinary Frosted Flakes, wondering if they were really that grrreat. I decided that they weren't. And as Bob Barker announced the prize for the next game, I wondered. I wondered about what could have been. Would life have been different if I had that Sausage Egg McMuffin by my side? I suppose it's to soon to tell. One thing is for certain. Anna-Maria will always be there. Serving as a reminder of a lost past.

A past without hash browns, a past without McMuffins, a past without hope.

But seriously, who gets a Quarter Pounder with cheese at 10:30 in the morning??
2:55 PM
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